


Slumber

by ConjureUpaSmile



Series: Like the Old Man Said [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff, Getting Together, Insomnia, M/M, Nightmares, mcu - Freeform, post AOU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-20
Updated: 2015-08-20
Packaged: 2018-04-16 05:50:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4613568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ConjureUpaSmile/pseuds/ConjureUpaSmile
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"‘Especially Steve,’ was probably more like it.  Semantics, the mechanic decided.  He had wanted world peace, created a killer robot that did its damnedest to wipe out the human race, and had been just as upset with himself as his teammates had been with him.  It was simple when you broke it down, really.</p><p>Either way, it didn’t make sharing a bed with Steve Rogers any easier while they were laying low at Clint’s farm."</p><p>Tony can't sleep.  It seems like Cap can't either, so they become insomniacs together.  That is, until they find a solution to their problem.  Tony has to figure out what it all means and what he wants, but he never can seem to keep from getting in his own way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Slumber

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Сон](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8245667) by [Unforgiven2205](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Unforgiven2205/pseuds/Unforgiven2205)



> Here's my first Tony POV story. I thought it would be a nice little change, but I think I just enjoy writing from Steve's perspective better. I don't think I ended up with the story I intended to write, but it is what it is! 
> 
> Once again un-beta'ed! I hope you enjoy!

Steve’s brow furrowed, revealing that the super soldier was overthinking it despite the fact that his pupils were blown wide and his fingers were digging into Tony’s ribs. It was now or never. Either he was going to give in to the desire that Tony was sure the blonde was feeling as much as he was, or he was going to deck the genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. For science, the brunette thought wryly as he gave the blue eyed beauty he was currently tangled up in bed a seductive grin.

Tony couldn’t believe that this dance had started nearly a year ago at the Barton homestead.

 

It hadn’t exactly been the genius’s proudest moment. While his heart was, figuratively, in the right place, the follow through hadn’t been quite was he was hoping for. 

World peace. 

God, he sounded like an air headed beauty pageant contestant bimbo that he would have proudly bedded and then promptly dumped in his younger years. In his mature years, however, world peace had been such tantalizing dream that he had accidentally built a genocidal robot in an attempt to achieve it. 

Naturally, the beacon of righteousness that was Captain America had been less than pleased with Tony’s handiwork. 

For what it was worth, Tony was just as displeased with himself. Ultron was an accident. He wanted nothing more than to do whatever it would take to protect his teammates and Pepper. Especially Pepper. Well, back then he was still trying to tell himself that it had been ‘especially Pepper,’ but even that witch had known better. 

‘Especially Steve,’ was probably more like it. Semantics, the mechanic decided. He had wanted world peace, created a killer robot that did its damnedest to wipe out the human race, and had been just as upset with himself as his teammates had been with him. It was simple when you broke it down, really.

Either way, it didn’t make sharing a bed with Steve Rogers any easier while they were laying low at Clint’s farm. 

Of course Clint was bunking with his wife during their stay. ( Seriously, though! Hawkeye married? That had been a shocker that even Tony hadn’t anticipated.) Then, Natasha and Bruce ended up sharing a room since they were playing their whole will-they-won’t-they game. That ousted one baby Barton from its room, so the two crib midgets were rooming together. Thor was off doing this own thing. That left Tony and Steve.

Barton was all too pleased about telling Tony and Steve that they were going to have to share a bed. He had given Tony that shit eating grin while he handed them their extra towels and blankets and even had the nerve to wink saying, “Sweet dreams!”

Steve hadn’t even fought it. Tony was so sure that Cap was going to put up a fight that Tony hadn’t said anything, either. The pair had just silently marched off to their assigned room like two children sent off to bed. 

Wasn’t Cap supposed to be all straight and narrow with his delicate 1940’s sensibilities? Apparently not as much as the brunette had assumed. 

Natasha had told him about Steve’s desire to find love in the 21st century and his reluctance to actually go on a date with any lady she mentioned, so Tony really shouldn’t have been caught off guard as much as he had been.

Both men laid awake. Back to back, of course, since Steve was still mad. The blonde man kept drifting off only to startle awake seconds later. That hadn’t exactly helped to soothe Tony, who was already on edge. Whenever he closed his eyes, he saw Steve taking his last breaths. He could hear Steve begging him to do more. Begging Tony to save him, save the team. 

By 3am Tony had given up on sleep. The people he loved most hated him as much as he hated himself. Not sleeping was just the beginning of his self-inflicted punishment, Tony decided. So, Tony did what he does best. Well, maybe what he does second best, Tony thought with a small grin. He laid awake and thought up all the ways to fix his problems.

What he wasn’t anticipating was feeling of Steve rolling over in bed to face him. For a moment Tony considered rolling over as well so that he could see Steve’s face, to see it unmarred and pink with life. He decided against it. He didn’t deserve it. Steve, though, had other plans. 

The larger man scooted closer. He tentatively reached out and touched Tony’s waist. Tony felt his unease, but Captain America was known for his bravery for a reason. “Tony…” the young man that had survived a plane crash and 70 years frozen at the bottom of the ocean whispered, “Don’t freak out.” Without waiting for a reply, Steve pressed his front to Tony’s back and wrapped his freakishly heavy arm around Tony’s midsection. His other arm snaked under Tony’s head and then Cap pulled him close. Impossibly closer, to be exact. 

Tony tensed initially. He was sure that Steve was going to suddenly tighten his arms and break Tony’s neck, ridding the world of Tony Stark forever. When the murder attempt didn’t come, Tony laced his fingers with Steve’s and let out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. Alright, so admittedly it had sounded more like some sort of sigh-moan, Tony conceded, but the point was that it caused Steve to relax as well. And that felt good.

Tony wasn’t sure how quickly he had fallen asleep after that, but when he woke up the two of them were still tangled up in each other and the sun was high enough in the sky that light was streaming through their window. 

Though Tony would likely never admit it, he allowed himself to lay tangled up with the man out of time in blissful tranquility for nearly an hour. When he felt Steve start to stir, Tony acted like the blonde’s movement awakened him. Steve just disentangled himself from the mechanic, mentioned that he was going to track down a shower, and went on like he had never held Tony close in the middle of the night.

 

 

Tony wrote the encounter off as an an anomaly. Steve had been in WWII. It was probably common among soldiers to seek comfort in each others’ arms during bleak times. It was probably just a coping mechanism. Besides, spooning is great. Who doesn’t like spooning?

It turned out that Captain America’s magic WWII cuddling worked. They defeated Ultron, Tony quit the team, and Steve stayed to build the new Avengers. 

Except Tony didn’t built a farm for Pepper. Except Steve hadn’t ended up living with the new Avengers. Actually, the latter was quite a story.

After a few months, the original Avengers all gravitated back to the place that they had all begun to think of as home. Tony hadn’t realized how he had grown to rely on each other until after they had all gone their separate ways. Apparently each team member figured it out in their own time.

That was how Tony gained five new roommates. The Wonder Twins were the first to show up on his doorstep. Allegedly there isn’t much work for spies once they’ve been outed. Tony suspected that it was just a story that Clint and Natasha wanted him to believe, but he took them in like two stray puppies. Between one new roommate in the air ducts and the other always emerging out of shadows without a sound, Tony hardly had a moment’s peace in his once quiet tower. As much as he would argue to the contrary, the change was nice.

The third roommate had been Thor. Granted he wasn’t always around, but apparently he needed somewhere to stay while he was on Earth to “visit dear Jane.” Boy, did man liven the tower up, though.

Steve was the fourth. He had been sheepish about showing up, but Tony could tell that the man had already lost too much family to say goodbye to the one he had made in the 21st century. 

The blonde man looked rough when he showed up. He had made an appointment with Tony though his secretary. To make matters worse, he showed up wearing a suit that Tony decided he wanted to burn. It didn’t do Steve’s physique any justice. He probably bought it off the rack. Hell, it probably itched. Still, Steve sat across from Tony and patiently pitched his case for the team needing to be together again.

Tony had just waved him off with information about when the movers would be by Steve’s place to pick up his stuff and move him in to Tony’s tower.

“Wait, what? You don’t have to do that, Tony,” Steve said, “I’m fine with the new guys. I was just saying that I appreciate your funding.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Cap,” Tony countered. “Movers will be there tomorrow morning. Happy will be by with a car for you tonight so that you can make it back here in time for dinner. I know that Rhodey will be upset, so you can tell him he can come for dinner, too. Sam, too, I suppose since you two veterans seem to be joined at the hip these days. Do you think it would be weird to not invite Vision since I created him? Alright, Vision can come. No Brain Witch, though. We don’t take kindly to her type here.”

Steve tried to argue until FRIDAY called out, “NYC Movers have confirmed your appointment for Captain Rogers’ move tomorrow, sir.” Tony couldn’t help but be amused at how silly it was that Cap would insinuate that he wanted to move in and then try to dissuade Tony from taking care of everything. Steve was right. The team needed to be together again, or whatever it was he was saying before the decision had been made that Steve was coming back.

Tony thought that Bruce was the only Avenger at large until he ran into him in the kitchen early one morning as Tony stopped by for more coffee before going to bed. He had stumbled inside to find Bruce and Natasha holding hands and drinking tea. The redhead hadn’t been willing to divulge any information as to Bruce’s presence, but guilt finally got the better of the scientist and he admitted that Natasha had found him and brought him back only days after the spies had moved in. 

Tony made a mental note to tell FRIDAY to discontinue surveillance in southeast Asia for Hulk sightings.

 

Post traumatic stress disorder is a bitch. Tony would know. Things were supposed to be better after Extremis. They were supposed to be better after Ultron. Things were definitely supposed to be better after he retired from the Avengers. The funny thing about all that was that he still sometimes saw wormholes opening over the tower and he still sometimes woke up in a sweat thinking that his best friends were dead. Sure, things were better, but they weren’t resolved.

Pepper didn’t like it. It all just reminded her of how many times she’d almost lost Tony. The genius also suspected that it reminded her of how much he had changed since he first decided to become Iron Man. He was broken now, but he wasn’t the only one.

It was a rare occurrence for the communal living room to be empty at night. Usually one or more of the Avengers was flipping through channels or engaging in some other mind numbing activity. The upside to that was then when Pepper inevitably kicked him out of bed for screaming or summoning the armor or having any range of perfectly reasonable responses to his nightmares, at least Tony didn’t have to sit around in the living room alone.

Usually.

 

 

One night after another not-coming-back-out-of-the-wormhole dream, Tony found himself alone on the living room sofa. Ever since the Extremis incident, the mechanic had found that companionship was much more favorable to being alone in these situations. He tried turning on the television for noise, but reality TV really wasn’t cutting it. Talking to FRIDAY had helped briefly, then it just made him miss JARVIS. 

Fine, he decided. He would try to sleep. He fetched a throw blanket that had been folded over the back of the sofa and started tucking himself in when movement caught his eye. Stumbling down the hallway toward the living room was a weary, shirtless super soldier. Alright, Tony wasn’t dead. Really anyone would have been momentarily distracted by Steve’s lack of shirt.

Cap beelined for the couch. Tony laid still because it was in his nature to make things as difficult as possible for the people that were forced to interact with him. Apparently that didn’t deter Steve, who just lifted Tony’s feet to make room for himself on the couch. 

“Bad dreams, Cap?” Tony finally broke the silence.

Steve made a non-comital noise. “The ice one again. You?”

“Wormhole.”

Steve made a noise that sounded suspiciously like a humorless laugh before commenting, “Oldies, but goodies.”

“You’re an oldie but goody…two-shoes.”

This time Steve let out a real laugh. Tony thought that sounded much better. “That was really terrible. You must be tired.”

“Your face is really terrible.”

“At least I’m not the one getting grey hairs and wrinkles.”

Tony’s jaw dropped. Were they about to fight again? Catching Steve looking a him through the corner of his eye, Tony could confirm that they weren’t. He really did appreciate Cap’s dry humor. You’d never imagine that he could be so sassy. It was refreshing to see the man act more like the age he should be.

“Ouch. That was a low blow, Cap, low blow. I’m remembering that one. Not all of us get to stay young and fresh though cryopreservation.” And with that Tony moved in closer to the soldier in something that was probably pretty close to what could be considered cuddling.

Then they talked and joked quietly between watching crappy television until they both fell asleep.

Tony woke up with his legs tangled up with Steve’s, their heads on opposite ends of the couch. It was difficult to remove himself from their makeshift bead without waking the tall blonde, but his effort was rewarded by successfully avoiding an awkward conversation with Cap. 

 

Months later it was Rhodey that eventually pried him out of his workshop. He had been down there what was going on four days, but he just couldn’t bring himself to return to the places where she had lived with him. So Tony sat in his lab, mostly destroying things for the cathartic nature of it, and trying not to think about the ring that had been sitting in his personal safe for the better part of two years.

He knew that the fact that he had never actually proposed was sign enough that he had been just as aware as she was that their relationship had always had an expiration date. Knowing didn’t make it any easier, though. It hurt to say goodbye to someone that he gave so much of himself to. It also hurt to know how much he had hurt Pepper. What were the words she used? Oh yeah. “I can’t take it anymore, Tony.”

“FRIDAY?” Tony called out.

“Yes sir?”

“Have the Pepper ring melted down and turned into a pendant. While you’re at it delete all files in the proposal folder.”

The AI paused before answering. “Are you sure that is what you wish to do, sir?”

“Yes,” Tony answered without much hesitation. “It is.”

Somehow that was more cathartic than destroying junked projects with mallets and blowtorches or buying up vintage Captain America memorabilia on ebay. What? Everyone needs a hobby.

“When it’s done, go ahead and have it sent to her.”

“What would you like the note to say, sir?”

Tony hadn’t thought about that. What was the appropriate thing to say that didn’t sound heartbroken or desperate. The last thing he wanted her to think was that he was trying to win her back. That wouldn’t be fair to Pepper.

“Have it say,” he paused, “Thank You.”

“Yes sir.”

“Hey, Tones?” As if he knew that Tony was finally ready, Rhodey entered the workshop using his override codes.

Tony sighed. Alright. Time to face the music. “Over here, Rhodey. What do you want?”

“I know things seem bleak right now, bud. I know how much you love her.” His best friend seemed to have his lines memorized as he gave Tony a come-out-of-your-workshop pep talk.

“Blah, blah, blah, other fish in the sea. I get it Rhodey,” Tony cut in.

“Wait…are you…are you sober?” Rhodey asked, face slowly breaking into a cheesy grin.

“Times they are a’changing,” Tony shrugged humorlessly. 

“Well, there’s a group of folks upstairs that want to fix your sobriety. Moderately. Everything in moderation.”

“Even moderation,” Tony finished.

“Look,” Rhodey started again, “Pepper is a very special woman. I’m not going to try to tell you otherwise. She deserves better.”

“Oh wow! Is this what you think cheering up is? I think Iron Patriot has taken a few too many blows to the helmet!” 

“Let me finish. You deserve better, too. I think that everything happens for a reason. I really do. For instance, I got dragged to some frat party that I really didn’t want to go to back my junior year at MIT and, lo and behold, find a little kid there passed out drunk…and twenty years later he builds me a totally awesome flying armor suit!”

Tony let out a bark of tense laughter and Rhodey gently punched him in the shoulder, happy to see that he was finally getting his best friend to lighten up.

“The point being,” Rhodey continued, “that you and Pepper were meant to be together for a certain amount of time. You both grew and learned, but now you’ve outgrown each other and it’s time for you each to find your true soulmate.”

Tony made a gagging noise. “If I agree to going upstairs, will you please stop talking?”

“Deal,” Rhodey agreed and threw his arm over the mechanic’s shoulder leading him out of the lab.

Sure enough, everyone was waiting for Rhodey’s victorious return in the common room. FRIDAY already had a Monty Python movie queued up and Natasha had a bowl of popcorn in her lab. Steve popped the top off of a beer and held it out to Tony as he plopped down on the couch next to the giant blonde. Tony let his eyes flick back and forth between the bottle and the blonde before slowly reaching out and wrapping his fingers around the cold beer. Steve gave him a smile that was entirely too soft.

“Shit, Cap. Was that even a twist off?”

“What’s a ‘twist off?’” Steve asked with a confused look, “I thought it was an IPA?” Alright, that was funny. Steve’s joke deserved a real laugh. Cap just subtly smiled to himself and asked FRIDAY to start the movie. 

It was a little frightening how well the group had gotten to know each other over the last few years. Everyone knew that Tony always enjoyed a good “Naïve Steve” joke and, when he was in a good mood, Steve didn’t mind obliging. The sassy bastard even seemed to know exactly when to make them so that the joke never got old. 

Tony realized he was staring and the blonde was pointedly focusing his attention toward the movie. Right, the movie. Tony took a swig of beer and turned back to the screen.

One movie turned into a movie marathon, which quickly devolved into drinking and talking over the movie. Natasha took off to bed, swaying ever so slightly from the vodka and, after waiting an appropriate few minutes, Bruce trotted off in the same direction claiming he was tired. Clint was showing Rhodey how traverse the air ducts. Tony was only moderately alarmed at Rhodey’s enthusiasm and at the combined level of inebriation of the two men. Once the duct above them grew quiet, Tony realized that it was just him and Steve, both nursing beers.

“Why are you even drinking that?” Tony asked with a comfortable buzz, pointing to Steve’s beer. “You can’t even get drunk. Why bother?”

“Solidarity,” Cap said, raising his bottle to Tony and giving him one of his signature captain looks. It was that smarmy one that Tony had a love-hate relationship with. One day his would wipe that smarmy look right off Cap’s face. Steven’s face. Steven Grant Rogers.

“Is that right, Anthony Edward Stark?” Steve asked.

Shit! Was Tony thinking out loud?

“Yes, but I’m pretty sure it’s just called talking when it’s said out loud,” Steve responded.

That’s nice. It’s nice that Steve knew the answer. He really isn’t as dumb as he looks.

Steve just blinked at him before responding, “I’m going to pretend that I didn’t hear that. Maybe you should try talking instead of thinking,” he offered.

“What would you like to talk about then, Cap?”

Steve just fiddled with the label on his beer bottle for a minute before quietly saying, “It really stinks. Loving someone that you know it’ll never work out with.”

“Pick a different topic,” Tony tried.

“The worst part is when they move on without you. It’s like seeing everything that you could have had,” Steve continued.

“Seriously, I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Peggy has pictures of her kids and her grandkids. She likes to show them to me. I’m happy that she got such a full and happy life…” Steve trailed off.

Fine, Tony would take the bait. “But?”

“…but there was a time that I thought I could be the one to give her that life. It…it sucks, Tony. I want you to know that I’m here for you now and I’m here for you when Pepper moves on. I’m here for you always.” The big man was beginning to turn an intriguing shade of pink, but he found a sentence to conclude his thoughts. “I mean it.”

Tony had words he wanted to say, or at least he had wanted to use words. Instead he was reduced to a few tears and manly sniffling. He would always argue that his sniffling was done in a manly manner. At least he hadn’t sobbed.

Steve just pulled him across the couch for a hug and held Tony until the tears were gone. By the time Tony had thought of a witty remark to make that would defuse the awkwardness of the situation, the super soldier was asleep.

 

“Sir?”

Tony jolted awake at the sound of FRIDAY’s voice. He must not have heard the AI’s first few attempts to rouse him since her volume was now obviously turned all the way up to 11.

“What is it, FRIDAY?” Tony asked groggily. The clock next to his bed read 2:33am which meant he had gotten exactly 17 minutes of sleep. Excellent. It wasn’t like he needed sleep anyway.

“Captain Rogers has awakened and is heading towards the common room. No other Avengers are present,” FRIDAY answered.

Maybe Tony had set a Steve’s-having-nightmares alarm. So what? It wasn’t like he thought it up on his own. FRIDAY, being the good little AI she was, started reporting to Tony every time Steve woke from a nightmare and inquired whether Tony was awake. Now that he had the alarm, FRIDAY could answer yes without it being a complete lie. 

“Sir?” FRIDAY politely reminded him.

“Alright! I’m up! I’m up!” Tony rolled himself up and out of bed and staggered to the elevator with his blanket still wrapped around him.

He struggled not to fall asleep standing up as the elevator made its way down to the common floor. He’d just emerged from a 38 hour session in his lab in an attempt to catch up on work for SI. While it was nowhere near his longest bender, it had left him exhausted. The elevator reached it’s destination with an unusually loud ding and the doors opened so that he could could then stagger to the couch where he knew Steve would be waiting.

“Hey, Cap,” Tony said blearily.

“Tony? FRIDAY said you were…I mean…uh…what brings you down here? You look like you were sleeping?” Steve was obviously caught of guard by Tony’s appearance. Damn, he forgot that when your AI tells your towermate that you’re awake, you’re supposed to look awake. 

Tony paused momentarily trying to think of a believable excuse. Fuck it. He was too tired.

“Shut up, Steve,” Tony said without any venom behind his words. He just plopped down on the couch and curled up against the blonde. “What was it tonight?”

Steve was silent. Tony looked up at him and found the super soldier to be looking back down at him with a small smile.

“What?”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I thought I was supposed to shut up.”

Tony groaned. “You know what? I don’t even know why I put up with you! America’s sweetheart, my ass!”

That made Steve laugh, which was nice. So, maybe he was America’s sweetheart. Maybe a little more Brooklyn than America gave him credit for, but Tony liked him better that way.

 

It was the first time Tony had awaken from a nightmare only to be informed that Steve was still sleeping. To make matters worse, it had been the vision that Wanda witch had given him. 

An hour passed and Tony knew that there was no way he was going to get back to sleep by sitting alone in his bed. It had become an unspoken pact that they slept together on the couch whenever either man found himself unable to find sleep alone, but this time Steve was snoring away without him.

Well, if he wasn’t going to sleep, Captain America sure as hell wasn’t going to get to sleep either. FRIDAY only sounded mildly judgmental as she took him to the common floor that the other Avengers had rooms off of. 

It wasn’t hard to break into the super soldier’s room since Tony had built the locks himself. It was Steve’s fault really for not changing them. Not that he would know how to change the electronic keypad, but that must be Steve’s fault, too.

Tony really didn’t know what to do once he got to the super soldier’s room and found himself staring down at the sleeping man. A few quiet “Steeeeeve”’s didn’t wake him up. Thankfully there was a lamp on the nightstand.

The blonde man nearly flung himself out of bed as the lamp crashed into the floor and shattered, but he managed to pull himself out of battle mode when he saw Tony standing by what was once the lamp.

“Tony?” Well, in Cap’s defense it really wasn’t a terrible question. It also wasn’t a terribly good question, because obviously, yes, it was Tony. The brunette decided to let it slide this one time and talk to him about his observation skills later.

“Oh good!” Tony said, trying to sound chipper, “You’re awake!”

“Yeah…” Cap said, somewhat wearily, rubbing his face, “I sure am.”

The two men stared at each other in silence. Tony really didn’t want to have to ask. He wanted Steve to let him save face. He wanted Steve to offer. Of course, Steve wasn’t budging.

“Cap,” Tony started, his voice sounding more tired than he intended. He swallowed hard, looking for his next words.

Finally, Steve scooted over. Tony accepted the open spot in the bed and the soldier began blathering on about tactics and baseball. The meaningless conversation and familiar weight next to him finally lulled Tony back to sleep. He might have imagined it, but he could have sworn he felt Steve run his hand through the genius’s hair as he drifted off.

 

 

Their couch meetings stopped after that. Clint was a bastard, so of course he mentioned something about it. Natasha and Bruce seemed to know better, but Rhodey felt the need to talk to Tony about whatever it was going on between him and Steve. Tony took to his lab after that encounter, his own version of “La la la la! I can’t hear you!”

The remarkable thing was that no one had said anything when the two men had started sleeping on the couch. Sure, they tried to be discrete, but simple statistics stated that the two men must have been observed sleeping next to each other by a teammate at least once. Apparently it was fine for the two of them to sleep there, but it wasn’t aright for them to sleep apart? Tony needed new friends. 

The funny thing was that the blonde and the brunette had taken to seeking each other out in their rooms instead of the couch. Which was fabulous, really. Instead of waking up with a dead leg and a crick in his neck, Tony could now enjoy all the comforts of not sleeping alone along with the comforts of a real bed.

So suck it, Avengers. He didn’t “break Steve’s heart” or “ruin everything” or “have an ill-conceived rebound.” He had a warm bed and a blossoming friendship that could remain as private as they wanted it to.

 

Tony would later admit that by the time they were spending every night together Tony knew he was lying to himself. He started going to bed early so that he would get to talk to Steve before they fell asleep. The blonde kept a drawer in Tony’s penthouse and Tony kept an extra toothbrush downstairs in Steve’s bathroom. Just in case. 

It was like a slumber party, really. Most nights they talked until they fell asleep. Most nights they didn’t even touch. Most nights Tony no longer had nightmares. He could make himself believe that Steve’s flashbacks were getting fewer and father between as well. 

Few people knew that the genius’s lists of conquests included several men back in college. In fact, at one point in his life Tony had been dead set on bedding Rhodey. The mechanic had always told himself that it was youthful experimentation, that his desire to be with men had been just curiosity, but Cap was making him feel a way he hadn’t felt in nearly 20 years. Steve made his heart flutter. Steve made him smile.

Steve made him happy.

 

One day Steve left on a mission with Sam and, although two may have gone, three returned. When Steve asked him if Bucky could stay, Tony couldn’t bring himself to say no. He really wasn’t surprised when he didn’t see hide or hair of the super soldier for the next week. 

For science, Tony reminded himself late one night when he found Steve alone in the kitchen. The blonde’s hair was mussed and, although it was late, he was pouring himself a cup of coffee.

“Hey, Capsiscle.” That’s right, Tony. Play it cool. “I was thinking it’s getting pretty late. Are you…coming?” Damnit. Not cool at all.

“Coming?” Steve repeated, giving the mechanic a confused look. 

Bucky chose the right time to make an appearance, moving to stand next to his old friend. Bucky had never been given his own set of rooms. No one had ever asked Tony for them. He didn’t want to think about where the Winter Soldier had been laying his head at night. What was it that the two 1940’s men would say to each other? That phrase that Steve sometimes whispered in his sleep? ‘You and me until the end of the line.’ 

The two men continued to stare at Tony for what felt like an hour before the mechanic decided that was enough.

“Right.” Good one, Tony. That one really showed them. That definitely wasn’t confusing, or vague, or all around childish. Go to your workshop. You don’t need sleep.

It had always been Steve and Bucky and it was always going to be Steve and Bucky. Tony was an idiot for thinking that he had ever been more than a placeholder. 

“FRIDAY? Engage full blackout mode. I want this place to be tighter than Fort Knox.”

 

“Sir? Sir? Sir?”

“Fine! What is it, FRIDAY?”

“Captain Rogers is back again. He would like to be admitted entrance.”

“The answer’s still no, FRIDAY. You know that.”

“Yes sir.”

But the door opened anyway. 

“FRIDAY? What the hell? I told you no!” Tony berated his AI as Steve started picking his away across the lab.

“I apologize, sir. Your 14 day blackout limit was exceeded. I am no longer authorized to restrict access to your workshop.”

Well, Tony thought, at least Steve looked like hell, too. Sure, the genius must look much worse, but it was reassuring to know that he hadn’t suffered alone.

“What do you want, Steve? I’m busy.” He called out across the workshop as the blonde approached.

Steve didn’t call out, but instead waded through the junk that had accumulated during the blackout until he reached Tony. When he finally did reach Tony’s side, the mechanic feigned interest in a broken gauntlet that had been laying on the workbench, likely untouched for months. Steve just stood there silently until Tony gave in and looked over to the taller man.

“Tony,” he started, “I…I can’t…” Steve trailed off before looking off and apparently summoning his Captain America attitude. “I can’t sleep,” the soldier finally finished.

Nope, Tony wasn’t going to make this easy for him. “How is that my problem?” The mechanic asked. “Go ask your 1940’s buddy to hold you.”

“Is that what this is about? I thought that you of all people would understand.” Yep, Steve was officially in full Captain America mode. “He screams at night. Did you know that? You think that you and I have issues? Try being the Winter Soldier. Have you even tried imagining what he went through? What he’s currently going through? I sacrificed getting to sleep next to you so that he wouldn’t have to be alone. I thought you’d be mature enough to understand that.” 

“You sacrificed? Just what did you sacrifice, Cap? Because I’m pretty sure that this isn’t anything,” Tony said cruelly, gesturing to the space between them. He knew his words would wound. They were meant to. It was better to drive people away than to let them hurt you.

He expected Steve to leave. The blonde turned and took several heavy steps away before turning back to face Tony, holding his arms open out to the sides.

“You want me to be the adult here, Tony? Fine! Bucky made me promise him to take this night for myself, so that’s what I’m going to do. Let me know if you get your head out of your ass.” With that, Steve resumed his path to the exit. 

“Language!” Tony bitterly called after him.

 

“Well, I’ll be damned.” 

Tony had angrily tried tinkering some more after Steve left, but his workshop was no longer sacred since the blackout had been forcibly lifted. Admitting defeat after a few hours, he headed to the penthouse. 

What he didn’t expect was to find a large form curled up beneath his sheets. 

Steve’s messy sleep hair had always been his favorite part of waking up next to him. Admittedly, he had missed it. Tony considered leaving. He considered holding onto his pride and making Steve wait and hope like he had that first week that Bucky had moved in. 

Or maybe, for once in his life, Tony could not look the gift horse in the mouth. 

He didn’t even bother changing out of his greasy work clothes. Lifting the corner of the blanket, Tony crawled in to bed next to his best friend. 

Steve stirred and rolled over to face him. “D’jou get yer head outta yer ass?” He asked groggily.

“I think so,” Tony responded. He moved closer, closing the space between them. With one hand, he ran his fingers though Steve’s disheveled hair. The other hand slipped under the blonde’s snug shirt and he gently caressed his rippling muscles. The soldier shuddered and reached out for Tony to ground himself.

That’s how they got here. Closer than they had ever been before. Touching each other in a way that they never had before. Steve was breathing harder and he unconsciously licked his lips, drawing Tony’s attention to them. 

“Steve?” Tony didn’t mean for his voice to sound so wrecked, so unsure. “Don’t freak out.” With that, he closed the distance between them.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!


End file.
